2023 - UKM ethos, goals, aspirations and guidelines.

[reefknot]

Membership to UKM
Membership to UKM is not your right, it is something that we choose to allow you to participate in. UKM is physically owned by someone, and though it is in the public forum, that is because that is how we choose it to be. We welcome your comments, we welcome your constructive criticism, we welcome your input. We do not welcome your bitching, your back biting, your destructive comments. If that is how you feel in regards to UKM, then why are you here?

In addition to the above, UKM now have a zero tolerance on flaming (flaming is defined as aggressive or abusive post/s or emails aimed at an individual or subject). Open and frank discussion is encouraged, flaming is not. We are all adults, we should be able to have a difference of opinion without resorting to abuse.

If we, as moderators and administrators have to censor a post, where ever possible, a PM will be sent to the member concerned asking them to edit the post and the reasons for such a request. If we have to edit a post or 'chastise' a member, it will be done as much as possible within the public forum, there will be an explanation of our actions, though it has to be remembered that we are only human, and as such are just as liable to make the odd mistake as YOU are!.

Reiteration of UKM ethos, goals, aspirations and guidelines.

Ethos:
"shared fundamental traits: the fundamental and distinctive character of a group, social context, or period of time, typically expressed in attitudes, habits, and beliefs"

UKM was a dream, set up to provide an honest, fun, informative service to those who have an interest in the BDSM scene, be it visiting the occasional Mistress, exploring your feelings online, or the total devotion to one Mistress, and anything in between. UKM has always tried to show integrity in everything that it does. We want you to share it's dream, to help make UKM all that it can be.

Goals:
"something that somebody wants to achieve "

UKM has undergone a period of change recently, however, it's goal remains unchanged. The Goal of UKM is to provide the best information network around, becoming a community as it does so. We cannot tell you where the finished product will end up, as UKM is very much a 'work in progress'....but each and everyone of you can contribute to it's success. We want you to participate, we want your input, your ideas, your interests, we want you to help build the UKM Community.

Aspirations:
"ambition: a desire or ambition to achieve something."

In many ways, UKM has exceeded it's original aspirations. It has grown and will continue to grow, beyond that of the original dreams. We receive over 250,000 hits a week on the site, we have a chat room, comprehensive Mistress listings, and a free personal ads section amongst other things. I guess in many ways, the new aspirations of UKM is simply to be all that it can be, to be the best that it can be.

Guidelines:
" official advice: an official recommendation indicating how something should be done or what sort of action should be taken in a particular circumstance."

Legal, decent, honest, factual, educational, informative, amusing and truthful only please, or any combination of those. Sexist, racist and homophobic content will not be tolerated.

Mistress Reviews should be tasteful and non-pornographic. Discussion of sexual acts within any scene should NOT be posted.

The subject of body worship is acceptable, provided it is tastefully done, but if any member needs further details then they should contact the member writing the post by private message or e-mail, and not via our boards.

Please do NOT put Mistresses telephone numbers in posts, nor details of tribute.

We do not allow the posting of direct adverts onto the message board.

The posting of real names or addresses or telephone numbers or names or addresses or telephone numbers which are known or believed to be real in posts may be construed as being defamatory or libellous to the person so named. You should note that in the event of a complaint being received by UK Mistresses we will immediately pass on e-mail ISP and IP number details of any member posting names to any individual or entity who we believe to be acting for or on behalf of the individual claiming defamation or libel. UK Mistresses will immediately ban any member who uses real names in posts and will take any further action they see fit in such cases.


Today is a new day in the future of UKM, all of the past squabbles and arguments are simply that, in the past. We all start here, with a clean slate in as far as UKM. However, if anyone is found to be spreading malicious gossip, posting deliberate lies, or deliberately going against the ethos of UKM you may be asked to leave, or your membership may be revoked.

Reviews:

I strongly suggest that you read the ‘what constitutes a review’ message that is pinned to the top of the Review forum. Above the forum you will see the following guideline/rules.

Here you may post reviews of sessions with pro-dommes. We ask for honest reviews; posts pointing out problems in sessions are as valuable to the community as post containing only praise.

All posts will be checked by the board moderators before they appear in the forum; there is a queuing system. We will not pass posts that are off-topic or that appear to be grossly inaccurate or any that seem abusively negative (reviews that are negative but factual and restrained in language are OK).

Where possible, we contact the Mistresses reviewed and invite them to reply to the reviews. Generally, this happens after the posting of the reviews so as not to delay matters. However, in exceptional cases we may hold a review until we have the Mistress' comments.

Please note that some Mistress have asked that no reviews of their sessions be published: see the topic pinned at the head of the forum.

Additional Rules and Information:
A gap of around two months between reviews of the same Mistress being posted

A gap of twelve months between reviews of the same Mistress by the same sub. Even then there will need to be substantial change in the session - perhaps a new dungeon or new style of play

A gap of no more than three months between the date of the session and the date of the review

We have taken the decision not to post reviews by new members. You need to make a valid contribution to this board in order to submit a review. Hopefully this will cut down on the 'advertisement' type reviews and will help to ensure that all reviews are as genuine as possible. However, if we have not had a review of a particular Mistress and we are offered a review by a new member, we may publish it, at our discretion.


Removal of ‘members’ of UKM;

It is rare that we remove a member from these boards. Occasionally, we have to suspend posting rights if debates get heated or personal. We tend to give people the benefit of the doubt, believing rightly or wrongly that you are all adults and able to conduct yourselves accordingly, sometimes however, we have no other choice but to suspend posting rights.

On rare occasions and usually under extra ordinary conditions, we will ban a member outright. In the past, these conditions have been because of illegal use of the message board, for harassment purposes, stalking or to manipulate topics by having several UKM ID’s for example. Yes, we do know if you have several ID’s and yes we can find out where you are posting from, however, we will not divulge this to third parties other than the police or relevant ISP’s should we be asked to do so.

Moderation of the fora:

As you are all aware, there are a team of moderators on UKM. Non of us are paid, we all volunteer our time and effort.

The team is as follows:

Lady Samantha and cerbie, co-owners

We are responsible for everything that happens on the boards.

Lisal and reefy, Admin and moderators

The ‘job’ of ‘Admin’ was created to help speed through the joining process, help with members account changes and generally keep an eye over the boards.

Moderating the boards is no easy task. Moderators have to be impartial, especially when tempers are high. Moderators have to be able to make sound judgments quickly and under pressure. We also have to be able to hold our hands up and say when we have made a mistake.

The ‘buck’ as they say, stops with myself and cerbie. The moderators and admin have their positions within UKM because we trust them and they have shown themselves to be/have:
• More than capable of moderating the boards
• Trustworthy and honest
• Intelligent
• A wide variety of BDSM experience, both professional and lifestyle
• Human

Sometimes it is easy to forget, especially when tempers are high, that the moderators are human too, and as such are open to making mistakes. Sometimes an issue may be long and complex and a moderator has to stop the ‘fire’ in the best way that they can see at the time. You should be aware however that all of the more complex moderating decisions and most of the general day to day moderating tasks are discussed within the private moderators forum. All moved topics are moved into that fora so that we can keep a record of them. Please remember however, moderators are allowed the luxury of hindsight too!! I would ask you all to cut us some slack as we do you.


Photographic material:

Due to the change in UK law, no photographic material on this site can be of an 'extreme' nature - See here for further details. Therefore, please monitor the images that you upload onto this site, whether it's to use as your avatar, on your profile or in a post. Inappropriate images will be removed and you may receive an infraction notice.

We have also taken the stance not to list sites that contain mainly photographic/film material/pay sites without the majority of the Mistresses time being spent on cyber or real life sessions.

In general:

This is by no means a complete list, it will most certainly grow and adapt to the ever changing needs and requirements of UKM, it’s members and it’s moderating team.